Monday, August 16th, 2004

I’m in a house talking to some other Asian Americans. I’m upset and sad about something. I say to a guy next to me, “Not to be cocky, but what I need is a protégé. Someone I can teach and help improve their writing.”

Later…

I’m in a big house that resembles my parents’ old place. Our child (or a friend’s child) has gone missing. People are tearing up the place looking for him/her. There’s even a tractor in the backyard digging up the dirt.

I look out the front window into the yard and see that part of the lawn has been replaced by a koi pond. I splash the water a bit to scater the fish and notice that many of them are dead and floating on the surface. There’s also a colorful sign posted above the pond about how the water stains the newspaper.

I go sit down at a table where some older family friends are sitting. I reach out for one of their hands and start crying. My mouth is full of watermelon and I spit seeds and pieces out as I cry.